, life’s essence can be distilled into a simple progression: birth, life, and death. We celebrate birth with joy and excitement, and we pour our energies into living as well as we can, striving for betterment and comfort. Yet, the final phase, death, is often met with silence or avoidance.

Birth is a blessing, and death can be a profound honor of your life.

Avoidance about Deaths

Renowned conservationist Jane Goodall has shared her insights about chimpanzees, noting that they are aware of and live with the concept of death. This idea is quite striking. It seems to point out that we humans often behave as if death isn’t a part of our society. If you look at YouTube or mainstream media, the focus is typically on making money, home improvements, comparing diets, discussing mortgage rates, and debating conflicts. There’s also a lot of attention on losing weight or dressing in a way that enhances our figure. But we rarely talk about the end of life—how we want to face death or what we consider a dignity death.

This avoidance is in contrast to how we meticulously plan other aspects of our lives, like meals, finances, and careers. Sure, we have life insurance, which seems similar, but it’s more about providing for our family after we’re gone rather than addressing our personal feelings about death and dying with dignity. It’s important to think about and prepare for our eventual passing with the same care we give to living our lives.

Bias of Deaths

We often overlook the reality of death because it’s uncomfortable and can evoke fear or sadness. It’s not something we readily discuss, perhaps because we prefer to focus on life and its immediate demands.

I watched one documentary which was featured a scientist who, after reaching 100 years old and facing terminal illness, decided to opt for legal euthanasia in Swedish, showcases a profound and personal choice. His last moments, shared meaningfully with his family over dinner before his peaceful passing, present a dignified approach to death that not everyone may agree with, but it does open up a dialogue. This choice raises ethical, cultural, and personal questions, challenging us to think about how we wish to confront our death and what it means to live a complete life.

Not easy to say but need to say

It’s true that when discussing the end of life, there is a risk of misinterpreting intentions, and it’s crucial to approach this topic with sensitivity. Different religions and belief systems have varying stances on euthanasia, suicide, or medical interventions that extend life. These beliefs must be respected, even as we acknowledge that death is an integral part of life.

However, the conversation around death should not be avoided; rather, it should be as normal as discussing plans for retirement. Recognizing death as a natural progression rather than something to be feared could shift our cultural view of it from being solely a sad event to a multifaceted experience that can be viewed from various perspectives. By opening up to these conversations, society can create a more accepting space for discussing the end of life, where individuals can express their wishes and confront death in a way that aligns with their values and beliefs.

No need to be hurry

There isn’t a need for a rigid or absolute definition of how society should perceive or accept death. Instead, the focus should be on fostering open communication about death to help our communities mature and uphold human dignity. Starting conversations about the practical aspects of death—like the cost of coffins, the necessity of their aesthetic appeal, and the various funeral and burial practices—can serve as an entry point to deeper discussions, just as we talk about everyday topics like food, housing, and health.

By normalizing these conversations, we encourage a broader understanding and acceptance of death. This can lead to more personalized and dignified end-of-life experiences, reflecting the individual’s wishes and the diverse cultural practices within our society. It’s about adding another layer to the tapestry of our community dialogues, one that can enrich our collective approach to life and its inevitable conclusion.

Deaths are living

I observe that a key factor in losing life’s balance might stem from neglecting the reality of death. Our society often draws a veil over death, leading many to believe, even if subconsciously, that death is distant and primarily concerns the elderly. However, events like the COVID-19 pandemic have starkly reminded us that death is an ever-present part of life.

Just as we invest significant energy in celebrating life’s milestones, such as weddings, with elaborate planning for beauty, attire, and cuisine, we might consider giving the end of life similar attention. Death is an integral part of our life cycle. Ignoring it can lead to an imbalanced life, filled with misconceptions about our own mortality. Recognizing and accepting death can help us live more fully, appreciating each moment with the understanding that life is finite. By embracing this, we can approach life with a more rounded perspective, valuing both our time and the people with whom we share it.

A prominent contemporary philosopher, Cornel West, frequently reminds his students that a crucial lesson in his distinguished classes is the understanding of death. He emphasizes the importance of recognizing death as a vital component of living a meaningful life.

Indeed, life’s essence can be distilled into a simple progression: birth, life, and death. We celebrate birth with joy and excitement, and we pour our energies into living as well as we can, striving for betterment and comfort. Yet, the final phase, death, is often met with silence or avoidance.

By recognizing death as a natural and significant part of our journey, we can begin to approach it with the same respect and consideration we give to birth and life. Integrating this acceptance into our collective consciousness could lead to a more holistic and perhaps more fulfilling experience of life, knowing that we have given attention to all its stages.

Death can be part of life option.

Reflecting on our birth is something we do in moments of gratitude or sadness, pondering the type of parents we have and the environment into which we were born—a setting beyond our control. However, our approach to death can be markedly different. While we may not have the power to choose the exact timing of our demise, we can prepare for it thoughtfully, considering where and under what circumstances we wish to pass, and how we would like our life to be celebrated or commemorated afterwards.

Humans have a tendency to fixate on elements beyond our control, yet it may be more advantageous to focus on what we can influence with our will, such as the preparations for our death. This shift in focus can empower us, offering a sense of participation in the full arc of our lives and ensuring our final wishes are respected. It’s a proactive step that reinforces our agency in life and in death.

Delusion of the reality

In today’s world, despite the advancements in technology that have made our lives more comfortable compared to a century ago, there’s a question as to whether we are leading lives that are more meaningful and happier. It’s clear that modern individuals confront mental health challenges and struggle to maintain a balanced lifestyle. A contributing factor to these struggles could be our collective neglect of death.

By not acknowledging death as a natural part of our existence, we miss out on the opportunity to live our lives fully aware of its finite nature. This awareness could potentially lead us to make more meaningful choices, prioritize what truly matters, and find a more profound appreciation for the life we have. Recognizing death as a part of life could help restore balance by reminding us of our shared humanity and the importance of living with purpose.

For instance, consider the story of a high-profile executive who, despite his wealth and success, had his life turned upside down by a sudden diagnosis. Steve Jobs, the co-founder of Apple Inc., was one of the most successful entrepreneurs of our time. Yet, when he was diagnosed with a rare form of pancreatic cancer, his perspective on the value of time over money shifted profoundly. Despite his resources, he couldn’t escape the inevitable, and his reflections on life and death became a poignant reminder of our shared mortality.

Similarly, think about your own life. If you were offered a significant bonus to work extra hours tomorrow, and you eagerly agreed, only to receive a doctor’s call later revealing a life-threatening condition, how would that news affect you? Suddenly, the extra pay might seem inconsequential compared to the value of each remaining moment of your life. This isn’t a far-fetched scenario; it underscores the unpredictable nature of our existence and why we should not take our time for granted or view death through a lens of fear or sadness alone.

These stories serve as poignant reminders, often arising from regret, that time and health are of the essence — more precious than any material pursuit. They underscore a universal truth that relationships and well-being should be treasured and prioritized. Such insights, born from moments of clarity during our most challenging times, call attention to the importance of living life with intention and cherishing every moment with our loved ones before it’s too late.

Death makes us rethink about meaningful life

To lead a more meaningful life and maintain our balance, we must acknowledge each stage of our human life cycle, including death. This isn’t a journey we should navigate alone; it calls for a collective effort. By discussing death openly, as an integral part of life, we can shift our perspectives and learn to value each moment more deeply. Sharing stories about the end of life can help us appreciate its significance. Just as we view birth as a blessing, so too can we come to see death as one of life’s most dignified chapters.

Share Thoughts

Consider your own end-of-life preferences. What sort of arrangements would you like to have in place? Envision where you would prefer your final moments to occur: in a hospital, at home, or somewhere else entirely? Contemplate who you would wish to have by your side. Reflect on your immediate emotional response to the concept of death. How does it make you feel when the topic arises? Also, consider who you wish to have by your side as you say farewell to this earthly existence. These may be the people who have shaped your life profoundly: close family members, cherished friends, or even a compassionate caregiver. Each person’s presence would reflect the relationships you’ve nurtured and valued, those who have provided love, support, laughter, and comfort throughout your journey. Their faces around you would be a testament to a life well-lived and loved, a final gathering of the hearts closest to you.

Birth is a blessing, and death can be a profound honor of your life.

Plato: Phaedo

https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/death/